Only last
week – that’s exactly a week before my 37th birthday – I discovered
Bruce Springsteen, and felt extremely disappointed with myself. How could
I have missed this world renowned phenomenon for such a long time in my life!
Felt like deep shit duh. When I read the lyrics and then heard (as is my habit)
the Streets of Philadelphia and Secret Garden, I cursed my stars, “God, why not
earlier?!”
Because
Bruce was waiting for demons within me to take full shape and threaten to
destroy the best version of me.
The pall of
painful blues had threatened to overpower my mind. Lurking demons had fought
hard to bring me down. This time I felt they were almost there at their pinnacle
of success, pushing me into the deepest pits of hopelessness from where I
would be unable to escape. But Bruce hit it home hard and soulfully that I am
not meant to be destroyed by my own mind.
I hate and fear the dark nooks of my mind. Well, I do confess that
by far, it’s one of the best minds I have ever known! But when the demons run riot, it
turns into a rotting breeding ground of doubt, anger, frustration and cynicism.
Bruce convinced me that day that I don’t have to cede control to the demons
each time, I don’t have to let the blues turn my usually ‘sunshine’ heart and
mind into a dark swamp of pain. That with conviction, and perhaps a little bit
of help, I can stand tall and strong against the forces that have, from the
time I remember, wandered easily into and played havoc with my mind.
All I can
say is Thank You Bruce. Most importantly, Thank You my guardian angel for leading me to
the Streets and the Garden. And can you believe it, I realized today that I actually share my birthday with Bruce Springsteen. Amen.
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